Coaching Carousel

With most of the 20 open head coaching positions filled in college football, I decided now would be a good time to review some of the changes. Of course, there's still some schools out there that could be added to this list. I'll try to update this list as more new coaches are hired.

1. Army

• Out - Stan Brock
• In - ?

Army has begun a national search for their next head coach. I think Brock did about as good as possible at West Point. I'm not so sure the next coach here will have any more success.

2. Auburn

• Out- Tommy Tuberville
• In - Gene Chizik

I have no idea what Auburn is doing here. They whiffed one one former defensive coordinator, so they panicked and went after the crappier one.


3. Ball St.

• Out - Brady Hoke
• In - ?

The Cardinals lose Hoke to San Diego St. As Hoke enjoys the much nicer weather, Ball St. will begin the search for a new coach who will face impossible expectations in Muncie. I look for BSU to tap the 1-aa ranks for this position.


4. Bowling Green

• Out - Gregg Brandon
• In - Dave Clawson

I really think Bowling Green jumped the gun when they let Brandon go. Fortunately for mes, Brandon is a top choice to replace Dan Mullen as Florida's offensive coordinator. Clawson backs his way into this job after helping to get Phil Fulmer fired at Tennessee.


5. Clemson

• Out - Tommy Bowden
• In - Dabo Swinney

The Tigers have already improved tremendously under Swinney. Their second half performance this season earned Swinney the job. We'll see how well he recruits and coaches for an entire season.


6. Eastern Michigan

• Out - Jeff Genyk
• In - ?

Wouldn't this be a good spot for Ty Willingham? I know he went winless last season, but if Chizik can get a job in the SEC, Willingham should be able to get a job anywhere.


7. Iowa st.

• Out - Gene Chizik
• In - ?

Auburn really did Iowa St. a favor. Not only do they get rid of an under producing coach, but they don't have to pay him any money. Look for a coordinator from another Big XII team to take this job. Kevin Wilson, maybe?


8. Kansas St.

• Out - Ron Prince
• In - Bill Snyder

I believe Prince should have been given at least one more year at K-State. However, Snyder did build this program into a national power way back when. He might be too old to do the same again. I guess we'll find out.


9. Miami(OH)

• Out - Shane Montgomery
• In - ?

I don't really know who the Redhawks will target for this job. Perhaps a 1-aa coach or even a Big Eleven assistant. Whoever they tabbed, he's got his work cut out for him.


10. Mississippi St.

• Out - Sylvester Croom
• In - Dan Mullen

I wish Dan Mullen nothing but the best in Starkville. However, I must say he really screwed us with the timing of this announcement. Damn him and Mississippi St.!


11. New Mexico

• Out - Rocky Long
• In - Mike Locksley

Locksley might be one of the better game planners in the nation right now. New Mexico does have a lot of talent on the offensive side of the ball. So this seems like a good fit.


12. New Mexico St.

• Out - Hal Mumme
• In - ?

The Aggies are going to be awful next season. Both Chris Jackson and Chase Holbrook will be gone. I feel sorry for whoever gets this job. It may be the worst job available this season.


13. Purdue

• Out - Joe Tiller
• In - Danny Hope

Hope is replacing a legend at Purdue. Fortunately this decision was made at the beginning of the offseason. That should relieve a little bit of the pressure. Just a little.


14. San Diego St.

• Out - Chuck Long
• In - Brady Hoke

The Aztecs were quite possibly the worst team in division 1 football this season. Kudos to them for going out and getting one of the hottest coaching prospects this off season in Brady Hoke. Hoke should find the weather and scenery much more to his liking in San Diego.


15. Syracuse

• Out - Greg Robinson
• In - Doug Marrone

This is a switch that should have been made last season in my opinion. I think the Orange whiffed on Robinson's replacement though. Turner Gill or Skip Holtz would have been better options than Marrone.


16. Tennessee

• Out - Phil Fulmer
• In - Lane Kiffin

Is it just me, or did the SEC coaching ranks get a lot worse this offseason?


17. Toledo

• Out - Tom Amstutz
• In - Tim Beckman

Beckman put up some pretty impressive numbers for Oklahoma St. over the past few seasons. At least he's taking over a team that managed to beat Michigan in the Big House last season.


18. Utah St.

• Out - Brent Guy
• In - Gary Andersen

Andersen remains in the same state as he leaves the Utes to take over a horrible Utah St. football program. Andersen may very well be the guy that can finally turn things around for the Aggies.


19.Washington

• Out - Tyrone Willingham
• In - Steve Sarkisian

I think the Trojans' defensive coordinator would be a better coaching candidate than Sarkisian. However, this is a good move for Sarkisian. He's taking over a Washington football team with little expectations, that I believe will be a lot better next season.


20. Wyoming

• Out - Joe Glenn
• In - Dave Christensen

Christensen is another top flight Big XII coordinator leaving to take on a head coaching challenge. The Cowboys were competitive towards the end of the season, including beating Tennessee in Knoxville. However, word was getting around that Glenn wasn't even recruiting anymore. That's a big no-no in college football.

Week 6 Preview

Last week finally brought the major upsets that we've been waiting for. USC lost to Oregon St. to open the week. That was then followed up by Florida, Wisconsin, East Carolina and Clemson all losing to unranked teams.

This week, there are a few games that could offer more upsets. Here are a few dandies:


Oregon St. vs. Utah

The Beavers are riding high after their victory over USC last Thursday. They are looking to knock off their second straight top 25 team. The Utes most likely will not overlook OSU, since the Beavers are a "bigger" program. However, it will be interesting how Utah plans on defending scatterback Jacquizz Rodgers. If Utah does win, then that will just continue the tradition of the Mountain West handing the PAC-10's it's own ass.


Kansas vs. Iowa St.

For some strange, ungodly reason, I like this Cyclone football team. For some even stranger and ungodlier reason, I really don't like this Jayhawk team. Kansas should roll in this one, but I wouldn't be surprised if ISU stayed in it until the end. If I'm right, we all know anything can happen at the end of a Big XII game.


Kentucky vs. Alabama

The Tide are America's sweethearts right now. ESPN has withdrew USC's cock from it's mouth long enough to start a slobber job on Nick Saban's bunch. Will this fellatio pleasure go straight to the Alabama players' heads? Probably not. But Kentucky is a solid team, and they will be fired up to knock off the Elephants.


Texas Tech vs. Kansas St.

The Red Raiders have faced nothing but JV high school teams to date this season. While the Wildcats don't present that much of a stiffer challenge, it's still conference play. The game is in Manhattan, where Kansas St. always seems to play much better. It will be up to Tech's defense to stop the Wildcats enough to allow Graham Harrell and Co. to outscore them.


Auburn vs. Vanderbilt

Statistically speaking, if the Commodores win, this wouldn't be an Earth altering upset. However, if the 'Dores pull out a win against Auburn, the entire college football universe will be turned on it's head. This is the only upset that I've actually picked to happen, so I think it's more than possible for the Tigers to leave Nashville with a loss.


Connecticut vs. North Carolina

I know I am seriously hating on Connecticut, but they can't keep winning. They've already proved me wrong by starting off white hot. However, once again, I'll be picking against them this week. Even with a dinged up QB, I like the Tar Heels to knock the Huskies out of the top 25.


Ohio St. vs. Wisconsin

I really don't think it would be an upset if the Badgers defeated Ohio St. in Madison this week. However, everyone else in America just about is picking the Buckeyes to win this one. So by popular opinion, I guess it would be an upset. I picked the Badgers in this one.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Possible Lane Kiffin CFB destinations

Tennessee - The Vols are finally fed up with Fulmer. Kiffin would bring a Bruce Pearl type energy to the football program.


Washington - Let's face it, Willingham is done in Seattle. Jim Mora Jr. is no longer available, so Kiffin would be a good choice.


Syracuse - There's SC connections here. Also, the Orange have grabbed from the NFL before.


East Carolina - Somebody's gotta replace Skip Holtz after he takes the Clemson job.


Florida St. - The 'Nole re-nig on their offer to Jimbo Fisher after another god-awful offensive season.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

1-AA teams that would be competitive in 1-A RIGHT NOW.

Appalachian St.
James Madison
McNeese St.
Richmond
Wofford
The Citadel
Delaware

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What the hell's going on with:

Tim Tebow

Tebow has not performed like last year. Blame it on less plays, more of a running attack, or defensive schemes against him. Tebow has not been Tebow-like. He badly overthrew receivers last week, including a wide open Louis Murphy on the final drive. Also, when was the last time you saw Tebow denied on a fourth and short? Never.

What has gotten into:

Colt McCoy

Unlike Tebow, Colt McCoy is playing very Tebow-like. He is getting it done through the air and on the ground. McCoy has his Longhorns looking very good. If they continue to play like this, they should head into Dallas undefeated for their epic clash against the Sooners.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

5 Games to Watch

1. Auburn @ Vanderbilt
2. Ohio St. @ Wisconsin
3. Oregon @ USC
4. Rice @ Tulsa
5. Florida St. @ Miami(FL)

5 Stories to Follow

1. How will Ole Miss, Oregon St., Michigan & Maryland respond after huge wins?
2. Will Tim Tebow live up to his promise of being bad-ass?
3. Will Mark May be able to juggle both USC and Alabama's cock?
4. Will USC lose to Oregon AND remain in the top 10?
5. Will Randy Shannon drown in a pool of his own tears because he refuses to stop crying?
   

All Suspended/Dismissed team

If you're a college athlete these days, it seems to be all the rage to go out and make a complete jackass out of yourself. Unfortunately for these morons, a suspension, or in severe cases, a dismissal from the team is a result.

These instances of tomfoolery seem to be more prevalent this year than in the past.

In honor of these grade A dumbasses, I've decided to make a team compiled completely of players that have been suspended or dismissed from their respective teams this upcoming season.


Offense

QB - Ryan Perrilloux - LSU - Dismissed
HB - Lance Smith - Wisconsin - Dismissed
HB - Leon Patton - Kansas St. - Susp. Indefinitely
WR - Josh Jarboe - Oklahoma - Dismissed
WR - JaJaun Spillman - Louisville - Dismissed
WR - Jeremy Childs - Boise St. - Susp. 1 Game
WR - Marques Wade - Arkansas - Susp. 2 Games
OL- Clint Boling - Georgia Tech - Susp. 1 Game
OL - Andy Christensen - Nebraska - Susp. Indefinitely
OL- Tyler Gray - UCLA - Susp. 4 Games
OL - Brandon Davis - Florida St. - Susp. 3 Games


Defense

DL - Brady Smith - Boston College - Dismissed
DL - John Gill - Northwestern - Susp. 1 Game
DL - Kevin Dixon - Nebraska - Dismissed
DL - Phillip Taylor- Penn St. -Dismissed
LB - Darius Dewberry - Georgia - Susp. 2 Games
LB - Jimmy Johns - Alabama - Dismissed
LB - Daniel Brooks - Tennessee - Dismissed
LB - Freddy Burton - Arkansas - Susp. 2 Games
DB - Jamar Hornsby - Florida - Dismissed
DB - Donovan Baldwin - Georgia - Susp. 1 Game
DB - Antonio Wardlow - Tennessee - Dismissed

Special Teams

P - Britton Colquitt - Tennessee - Susp. 5 Games
K - John Barker - Syracuse - Susp. Indefinitely
RS - Preston Parker - Florida St. - Susp. 2 Games

If you give me the guys on the list I guarantee you I will win some games. Of course, my program will be in the shits for letting a bunch of douche bags run wild, but isn't that what football's all about anyway?

Countdown: 87 Days!

87 Days

Deon Murphy may be one of the fastest players in America. He will need to become more reliable as the go-to receiver for Josh Freeman and the Wildcats after the departure of All-Everything Jordy Nelson.